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Title: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Oct 31st, 2005, 7:11pm Women who play hard to get are just playing games with a males mind. Its no different than a man who lies and cheats. My mother told me if she plays hard to get whats to say she will not be hard to deal with on other issues. She never told me a woman playing hard to get would be worth it or wouldnt be worth it. Well to me...especially now that I am older.. I have no time to play games. In other words if you like me let me know if not then let me go. Answers like well... I never said I didnt like you..is an answer by a woman who is playing hard to get. Dudes post some stories of women playing hard to get and gals post the reasons y u do this. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Need4Speed8DaleJr on Oct 31st, 2005, 8:16pm Joel... Now this is a Good Topic. lol When I worked in a store about 8 yrs ago there was this beautiful PI Gal who worked on cash. She had this nice smile and I liked her instantly. Well...to make a long story short, I persued her for what seemed like a month. No Luck. She NEVER took the bait. I would suggest that we go see a movie together, she told me she went to a great restaurant on her day off and I would suggest we go there together. Nothing. lol. I was very discreet when talking to her and most of the time we took our lunch break at the same time. Well after a month of no response I gave up since there were other Gals who worked there who made it clear to me they wanted to go out with me. I very discreetly started dating another Gal. About 5 or so yr later the PI Gal had the assistant manager call me in the office and ask me right out if I had any feelings for the PI woman because the PI Gal wanted to know, and that she expressed interest in dating me. HaaaaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaaaHahahaha!! I NEVER could understand why she just didn't go out with me when I first started working there, and NOW after almost 5 yrs or so she wanted to date me??!! PLeazzzzeeeee. I have better things to do than to play games or wait around. Life is Waaayyy too short for that. I later found out that someone else was interested in her, but she secretly was in Love with me. She had to ask me how I felt about her to know for certain, so that she could move on and date/marry this other dude. I will never understand Gals who play hard to get. I consider it playing games. I also agree with Joel's Mom. lol. I think She is right, people who play games are hard to deal with on other matters. On the subject of some of the Gals in AC1. Hmmm...Where do I begin? lmao Ok..Most of the Gals there play some serious head games, Including Hard to Get. They all talk with each other about who-likes-whom and they make it pretty clear to the other Gals to stay away from him. THEN...after about 2 months or so of Pm'ing, they just loose interest....wanna know why? They are playing hard to get...or maybe they are used to guys who just fall all over themselves to chat with them and to tell them how pretty they look and all that other crap. And when that doesn't come...Look Out! They get Crazy. They start to ask questions....personal questions. They just wanna see how far they can toy with him. There are some Seriously Twisted Gals out there. But Hey...Attention knows No Bounds. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Oct 31st, 2005, 9:42pm All the world's a dating game and all the men and women merely players. Men are taught to play hard to get in order to seem more attractive to women, while women, usually on the receiving end of the "pickup," are conditioned to be a challenge, like a porcupine whose quills stand up on end when on the defensive. Dating is a game and if it wasn't, it wouldn't be as much fun. If you've successfully dated every woman you approached, you might have one hell of an ego but in the grand scheme of things, you wouldn't have any fun. As aggravating as it is to pace around your living room, wondering whether she's interested in you or not, the challenge of it all makes dating more exciting. So why is this woman never accepting a date or returning your calls? Well, she already knows but it's up to you to find out. the pickup Exhibit A She's at the same old bar with the same old friends, in her little miniskirt and halter-top. You see her from a distance and she's constantly looking your way. You approach her with your sinister glare and killer smile, and you even use the approach that has never failed you before. But for some reason, this fish ain't biting. Verdict Granted, she goes out dressed to kill with her guns pointing right in your direction, but that doesn't mean she wants you to approach her. She wants men to look her way and she would be upset if they didn't. But when men do gawk and approach, she doesn't want to be made to feel like a piece of meat. She's therefore going to be standoffish, unless you don't treat her like a mission of yours. the call Exhibit B You've beaten the odds and gotten her number, but that's only half the battle; you haven't called and asked her out yet. You dial her digits and lo and behold, you get her answering machine. "Hi Sandy, it's Mark. I met you on Saturday night at Alley Kats. Just wanted to say hi and see how you're doing. You can reach me at 555-5959. Speak to you soon, Mark." Two days pass and she still hasn't called you back. You call her again and happen to catch her answering the phone. She apologizes for not having called you earlier but she was busy, busy, busy. Verdict Why didn't she call you when she had the chance? The same reason you would play hard to get with her. She's playing her cards right, and doesn't want to look too available. She wants to be pursued and wants you to think she's calm and collected, even though her heart may skip a beat when the phone rings. Remember that appeal and interest usually increase relative to the challenge involved. If she were available whenever you wanted, called you all the time, and slept with you after one night, you would lose interest quicker because the hunt is over. You have her in your back pocket, along with the home, work, cell, and fax numbers that she gave you. But if she keeps you guessing and doesn't tell you what she's doing Friday night after she declines your date, you're left intrigued. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Oct 31st, 2005, 9:43pm the invitation Exhibit C It's Wednesday night and you want to call her so that you can secure reservations at a trendy Moroccan restaurant, and impress her with your good taste in cuisine and atmosphere. She says she's busy on Friday night, and when you ask her about Saturday, she replies that she's taking her aunt to the airport. Is she busy for lunch? One day she has to take her cat to the vet and the other day she has to take her mother shopping. Frustrated and fresh out of ideas (you were close to suggesting driving her and her cat to the vet but decided against it), you tell her to call you when she's ready to do something (or at least consider it). She has your number -- you gave it to her 3 times, area code and all -- but still no call. VerdictIf a woman has your number and has declined two of your invitations without mentioning the possibility of a future date, she's not playing hard to get; she's playing hard to never get. If she were interested, she would call you at some point or at least apologize for being so busy and give you a future possibility, like mentioning that next week is much better for her and that the two of you can go out then. If she's busy all the time and makes no attempt to keep the window of possibility open, it's clear she doesn't want to waste either of your time. Move on, game over. the date Exhibit D On the other hand, if she does accept your invitation for a date and the two of you secure the time and place, then you're still in the game, buddy. You take her to the Moroccan place you had in mind and everything is going great -- the conversation, chemistry and couscous -- you may just stand a chance with her. At the end of the night, you take her hand and lean over to kiss her once you arrive at the romantic waterfall down the street. She pulls away shyly and walks the other way towards the car. VerdictWhy the sudden disinterest? She may not trust you right away. She has either been hurt in the past, or her friends have been hurt, or she has heard her male friends boasting about how they succeeded to ditch a woman after having sex with her. Her distrust and intuition cause her to play hard to get with you. She doesn't want to get sucked into whatever game you may or may not be playing and she's protecting herself from getting hurt. Men don't give women enough credit, and don't realize that even if a woman has had only the best of romantic experiences, she has a natural instinct, a sixth sense if you will, that you can't mess with. So if she's proving to be more of a challenge than you anticipated, then she may just be testing the waters with you. the relationship Exhibit E Everything with you and the woman of your dreams is going great but she's still holding her guard with you. You want to go away for a weekend, but she's still hesitant about those plans. VerdictAlthough men are less likely to commit to a relationship, when they do fall for a woman in particular, they are usually surer about it than their female counterparts. Men aren't as likely to ask hypothetical questions such as "what if I meet someone at work?" and "what if she's not Ms. Right?" Women, on the other hand, ask themselves too many questions in order to figure out whether you're the man they have been looking for their whole life. how do you plea? Playing hard to get is part of the dating game, not to mention the part that makes it fun. And you shouldn't let her do all the playing -- when you're pursuing a woman, play the part of the challenge too. While she declines invitations and doesn't return your calls, you should make it clear that you're busy and have your own life as well. Once you show her that your life revolves around her (at least too early on), she will never want to be part of that world. Both parties are armed with their rules and methods of playing the game, in the hopes of winning the ultimate prize. Once you know why women play hard to get, whether it's in order to be pursued, be cautious, or because they're simply not interested, at least you'll have the upper hand in the game and you'll know if and when to move on to the next player. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Oct 31st, 2005, 10:00pm Like my biatch said " Woman are complex!" THe more u can understand them, the better the relationship would be. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 1st, 2005, 2:06am Well cooch....first of all those are all hypothetical situations..unless she used actual people in her experiment. And human beings are not lab rats. So how would she know this to be accurate. If its hypothetical it isnt accuarate and if she did use males and females in her experiment, which I highly doubt she did, how did she come up with her conclusions? You cant expect to do an experiment in a uncontroled atmoshere like dating between men and women and come up with accurate information. When has anything emotional as romance, love, dating or whatever else dealing with the actions and reactions of the human mind been accurate information. Maybe she just interviewed a bunch of people and drew her own conclusions from that. If she did its not accurate info either. When something like dating is asked to others lots of jealousy, vengence, and emoitonal responses are given. Thats just a womans opinion is all. No basis to it whatsoever. And also this article was written by a woman..so its only natural that it is a womans point of view. How could she possible know what a male is doing or up to or his intentions? She is a woman. The simple fact is when both men and women become adults they expect more from each other. Dating for a male in his 30s, 40s, or even 50s is not the same as the dating he did when he was in his teens and 20's. Sure there will be those who play games while dating or trying to date each other...but those are the immature ones who do not know what they want and the ones who are so scared they forgot what it was supposed to be about to begin with. I am at the age now, where I know exactly what I want. I dont need to play hard to get or with anyones mind. If i wanted to play hard to get and the games that go along with it I would go to the club and meet women there. I wouldnt be asking any female out on a romantic date to mess with her mind. And I wouldnt expect the woman I ask to do the same with me. And since when did not getting what you want become a fun thing???? Maybe it is fun for the woman playing hard to get? But not for the man who wants more out of a woman than just mind games. I say beating around the bush gets you nowhere especially when you want to progress. Men and women will never understand each other completely. Just not possible. Maybe a gay guy can understand a woman better than a straight one..but a gay guy doesnt do a woman much good does he? What straight males and females can do is accept each other for being a male and female. If either sex tries to understand each other completely just gonna be a lot of confusion and arguments. Acceptance is the key not understanding. A man can no more be a woman no more than a woman can be a man. These are my words and not ment to offend anyone. And I dont need any article to back them up because I know them to be true and honest. Its just common sense. Others can post all the Sigmund Freud or whoever else you want...but when you use others words common sense tends to be thrown out the door. ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Nov 1st, 2005, 2:36am Well, Joel...have you guys ever considered that maybe....just maybe the woman really is not playing a "mind games" with you but just making sure you guys are for real and not just taking the woman for a ride? Heck...it's bad for a female's ego when the man professes "undying" interests in a woman, then she goes inside the room and see him flirting left and right!(this is for ONLINE dating) Or maybe the woman is not really interested in the man but she just doesn't have the heart to put it in words? Or that maybe the woman really, really likes you but then....so are the other guys around? The possibilities are endless....so maybe I can just advice you guys to look deeper into your case and find out first what the woman is like on the inside? Is she the flirty type? If she is then she's not playing a mind games with you but she just don't want to make commitments and lose the other guy's attentions? Or is she the serious type? If she is, then she will not make a move unless she can get a commitment out of you? If she's the happy-go-lucky type, maybe she just want to have fun and don't want any form of attachments with anyone?...Or maybe the woman is also interested but that she is already taken and can't admit it to you for fear you will lose interests in her? Like i said...dig deeper ;) |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 1st, 2005, 4:18am WEll Joel, in almost everything we do there is always a trial and error, experiment,challenges, theories to be proven and so on ...Going through the things we do.. there is always trial and error., challenges we play and encounter... experiences back up our theories and conclusions..Sigmund Freud gives us a better understanding of how our ego affects us..books..we read to better understand how and what is all about..all these are facts of life and theories helps us understand how we evolves in this world. Its the same scenario I had given that explain why woman became the way they are..however, there are some people that does not understand...dig what is deep within(Witchy's excerpt) why certain people acted the way they act. interpretation of how we, women, act dictates differently. Guys in their own interpretation of woman's action is different from what woman thinks of their action...therefore understanding is the key . Acceptance on the other hands plays a rule however, even if you accept certain situation, does not mean that you agree to anything . Complexity of the situation tends to confuse once mind. This is when guys interprete gals action differently. But remember, in every woman's action, there is always a reaction and reason behind it...Understanding what is behind it is a mystery to some,and challenges to others..and likewise to a few is a game . Sensitivity to both feelings sometimes get them in submission. Understanding on the other hand, clears some doubts what we have in mind..Woman ask questions, man, confuses woman's question as nagging..therefore, ASK question directly and find out why...Guys assume things that we can read their mind..and vice versa..At this point you guys thinks that game playing begins....Mix messages that we send to each other that is out of control.(discreetly dating as Dale mention, maybe at that point, this gal thinks that you are a player...woman talks, it is their nature...so they ask around to fully understnd your intention. and yet at the sametime, find out if what their first impression is true or not about you...again this is just theories and conclusion yet our experiences backs it up for what we learn and experience in that matter. Scenarios are comparison to what we learn and experience in life..Facts we tend to believe as they are proven..Theories and experiments are a foundation and tools to understand what we believe. Everyone, has their own opinion and conclusion to something..we agree or disagree on something, yet that is our nature..Understanding to agree of what we agree tend to make it more confusing.. So therefore asking question and getting that answer will clear that misconception of why gals plays hard to get) Gals tend to seek attention, and guys tend to avoid giving attention (too insensitive to their feelings..Pride plays an important rule to a man's ego.)Ask and you get an answer..Assumption assupmtion... will not get you anywhere....Sensitivity to some, tends to get you understand how and why woman acts the way they are!!! and vice versa..Never judge a book by its cover..Read what is deep within and you better have a better understanding how it is written. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Need4Speed8DaleJr on Nov 1st, 2005, 5:06am Ok...First I think we need to clarify a few things. Both Men & Women play "Hard to Get". But when Men do it, women call it Lying. lol Joke..Joke. ;D Next I think we need to set the record straight between online and face-to-face (FTF) relationships. Both are very different situations. I think Online relationships are much more Difficult because you can't always see the reaction of the other person, and very often there is sooo much more going on than what "lol" can express. No one relationship, online or FTF, can cover what other people have been through or are gong through. Listening to each other is the most important tool we have to understanding fully just what the other person has to express. Next, talk to someone...not at them. There is a difference. I think that Wicked_Witch has brought up some very valid points. There are always motives behind someones actions and reactions. While some people choose to "Play Around" on the Net both with Feelings and with people in General, there are just as many who don't dare do such a thing. I just want to comment further about Men on the Net. I see alot of men online who flirt endlessly and openly with Gals. They think nothing of saying....ok...let's be Honest...Lying if you will openly to the Women because they know that's what the Women want to hear, or maybe they just want attention themselves from the Women. And because those Men do crazy things that taints most of the other Women's view of ALL Men on the Net. They view Men as a Group who always has some other reason behind what they are saying. I know that there are Women who have fallen for the lies of some Men, and later they learnt that he has told the very same line to other Women around Yahoo. That does happen...ALOT. But what Joel is trying to say is....(I think) is when some of the Men who don't play games on the Net start to chat with a Women, they view him as only a lying player. And sometimes it can get frustrating to have to "Break Through" the Emotional Barrier to make the Gal understand that either he likes her "For Real", or that he just wants to chat with Her and be friends. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 1st, 2005, 6:03am Well, my advice to you Dale, the break through thing is to be yourself. There are guys that I knew of,that they chat differently when they are in the room, and when in private, they are totally the opposite. Again, same as woman, some they just joke around, some are serious and vice versa. I know it is frustrating to find out what is real and what is not real..Hey, just put it this way, I always enjoy having conversation with bots...lol.. Note: There is a way who you trust and not to trust!!!! |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by nOrKAy on Nov 1st, 2005, 7:03am This is actually interesting.It makes me "hmmmm". Anyway,I will be back.And to make it simple,I will speak with my own explaination.I mean,I will not speak through experts' or books' thoughts,although they are unarguably true,but I will try to explain my own/personal reasons. BRB :P |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by mylane on Nov 1st, 2005, 7:40am interesting thread...just too much to read...LOL... ;D Wonder who are those men and women of AC1 that likes to play hard to get... ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 1st, 2005, 4:01pm YOu should have a trend that says: What are your signs if a woman is playing hard to get. Maybe that will explain your dilema. I think this will clarify the views, of a man. I gave you a scenario and lets debate so we better understand why woman they act the way they act. To better understand fully. (WHen approach a woman, first, you have to think, the culture, the way sorroundings, and many other influencial things that influence the way they act. FIrst Scenario: Let's use Dale's since he gave a good example about her friend from PI. FIrst she is from another country, and learn first of all that cultures in another state, they are very modest and humble..do not take that as being playing hard to get..They cannot express directly how they feel bec. in their mind, they are too easy. And again, if you try hard to court this person, she have this thinking that she is really important and special. or you are worthed to be with. Time and patience is the key..however, guys likes action. They cannot wait. In a relationship, it takes time to develop and learn certain people. That's is why they gossip to learn little of something about you.. You have to realize that maybe she has an experience also in her life that dictates why she act the way she act..Being careful...again do not take that as a sign of being hard to get. Anyway, how is your understanding so far Joel? Am I making any sense? I have to come back and continue this discussion later.. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by dOnUtz 9urL on Nov 1st, 2005, 6:05pm hmmm... very interesting... ;D l dunno about some women play hard to get, or just making sure that the guy wasn't playing around with her... a gurl go out with a guy... dunno if ppl will consider this a date thow, since it was normal outing, just get lunch together, talk, then coffee. and they parted. that's it. then the guy kept asking her out, so she thought that this guy showing that he is interested at her. but then she knows that the guy also go out and asked other gurls out, and find out that he was trying to figure out which gurl he will choose... But instead of doing deep thinking, he go out with all the gurls in the same time. when this gurl find out the truth she was agast... he still asking her out, calling her too while he go out with other gurl, she guess he just playing around but dont wanna loose her, he want to keep all the gurls. But she cant believe what already happen cuz the guy was kept showing that he was interested at her, when she pull out, the guy kept calling n asked her out, so she was totally confuse. then in order to find out about the truth, she just refuse couple time he asked her out, she want to know how hard he will do the effort if he really want her. she thought if he really wanted her then he wont stop trying. is that considered she playing hard to get ??? ??? So in my opinion, all depends on the situation... if it was needed then l guess women are allowed to play hard to get, as long as they aren't playing it on purpose. in those kinda situation, it was needed in order to find out the truth about what this guy really wanted. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 1st, 2005, 9:15pm on 11/01/05 at 16:01:48, CooCHie wrote:
Cooch my understanding is fine...I understand anyone can sit around and make excuses for thier behavior. :D Throw them all out there if you wish..race, different culture, the color of thier skin..it matters not...its about honesty..I guess you think honesty means something different in a different culture. I think not. Women have a choice to make and if they choose to play hard to get fine let them do it. I am willing to bet most of the time it never pans out the way they want it to. Their thinking when a man never calls them back is..well all he wanted was sex or it was not ment to be or could be thousands of other reasons. The most obvious one never comes to mind...maybe the man knows exactly what the woman is up to and he doesnt want or need to deal with someone who wants to play with his mind in his life. Listen you can throw all the mumbo jumbo you want. Why does a woman do this for this reason or that reason...to me it is the same story...mind games are mind games and its possible it can be due to her previous experiences but if she is really that scared and cautious about dating..my suggestion is she shouldnt be dating in the first place because she isnt ready yet. I am willing to bet most of it has to do with.. is she wants the man to crawl to her and prove something as if it was some kind of test. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 1st, 2005, 11:56pm on 11/01/05 at 18:05:24, dOnUtz 9urL wrote:
I not think that is hard to get beth. Hell she need to dump the dude if he going out with other women. I think when a woman is playing hard to get she wants something more. My problem with that is y play games...just be honest about it and tell him or her what it is you want..that way you know where each other stand up front. Who cares who it is who asks first. I know if I want something I attempt to get it..if I dont get it yes I might be hurt..but at least I know I tried and gave it a go and I know where I stand. Lots of females would say will its the mans responsibility to do this...who says so??? Women complain about it being a man's world well how about stop complaining and taking more action and responsibility for what you want??? |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Nov 2nd, 2005, 3:46am Thank you very much, Dale. ;). Well, Joel...I don't think "crawling" is the right word to use. I think the woman just want to make sure you are taking her seriously and not just playing around. And too, if you are just dating the woman and not attached yet, if Im in her shoe, I wouldn't dare tell you to stop dating other girls or asking them out. I think you need to understand first how a woman feels about these things before you accuse them of playing "hard to get". Because women, regardless of culture and whatever are possessive by nature. Some are just very expressive when they go about these things. Some just "sulk" over it, some pretend it doesn't bother them. But believe me, if given the choice, they wouldn't want to see the man they have feelings with to go on dating with other girls. So in cases like this, you can't call it "mind-games", but just the woman trying to protect her heart. And I'm sure you can't take that against her, can you? :P |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 2nd, 2005, 9:31am on 11/02/05 at 03:46:36, Wicked_Witch wrote:
Well said Witchy and Dale..The key word, both gals and guys plays around..For Joel, your frustration goes with gals as well, they cannot figure out what their intentions and motivations. I agree as you grow older, you tend to know more of what you want. Wanting something and being honest is the key..I agree, honesty plays an important rule but i did not say that honesty has a different meaning in other culture..Honesty where ever you are meant all the same what ever race, culture u are in..Situation and, behaviour on the other hand, and cultural influences dictates personal views and believe of why they behave the way they behave..Playing is behaviour pattern.. so you have to understand why they behave the way they behave..IF you dont understand it, you will never learn to cope with it..If you think that they have "excuses" bec of their cultural differences, you did not fully understand well, how it affects certain scenario to a certain situation...You agree the scenario of Beth as not playing a game..At a certain portion there, there is a behavior pattern of playing a game.? Am I right or wrong? Like what witch said and dale, motivation, intentions we needs to find out..But how we expressed our intention and movitivation is the key to misunderstanding in a way. and getting accross to each other of our intention is how again can we can fully understand if we are playing hard to get or not., some gals have different views of dating and what they want..Some gals/guys, are more reserve..they cannot express their own's feeling..that alone can be misinterprete inthe wrong way. And again, you have to have a broad mind, open mind to fully understand WHY and HOw woman/man act the way they are..Play the game the way you think they do and the only way to understand is COPE with the situation, behavior of that person. Determination, patience, and compliments , communication, honesty will then plays a very important rule in coping and understanding certain behaviour and situation. And if this is not you..then its is your choice to stay in the game and lose the only thing that makes your heart tingle. (lol) It is you who controls you..If you want to deal, or you want to fold..THe winning card is in your hand..It is you who controls it..It is you who decide who stays in the game. In every winning card, there is strategy. And in life, winning someones heart, there is strategy. How you play it and how you are determine to win the game the only one who can answer that is YOU no one else. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by earthlingorgeous on Nov 2nd, 2005, 9:51am Hmmmm ... interesting topic... but like what Mymy said too much too read. Anyway in my POV (point-of-view) women are not really playing hard-to-get but weighing the circumstances of your sincerity and her feelings towards the pursuer. Since time begun, women just wait for a man to approach her, and eventhough its the new age now, that trait (culture) still lives despite the independent women thingy getting huge now a days, (its an embeded behavior). With the situation Dale described about a co-worker, maybe she is aware of some sort of office ethics (there is such you know and its written in office handbooks) With Joel's situation its not really playing mind games you know. Women just wait for what seems to their perception is the right man for them. It's not playing mind games really when the guys thought its "playing hard-to-get". Men are the pursuer and women just wait. But women can't just grab on every man that pursues her ok. What if she is still committed to other men or she is secretly inlove with another man that she doesn't want to entertain other men and wait 'till that man approach her. Also, weather we admit it or not, we women do some series of test on men who pursue us to see how sincere he is in pursuing me and probably go beyond the dating scene. So guys, the dating game is like that, you men are the pursuer and we women are the chooser. And a question for you Dale and Joel, ain't it true that you men have this perception about easy-to-get women too? And infact you have categorized women for a bed material to a bride material? |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by mylane on Nov 2nd, 2005, 10:01am Nice Post Biatch.... ;D Prolly those men and women that are playing hard to get are just all confused because they are talking to more than one person online...too many chat mates, that they cannot tell who's telling the truth or who among them are sincere.LOL LOL. ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 2nd, 2005, 6:35pm Listen its hypocritical for you all to think this way...a game is a game is a game. I have been out with women who didnt play this hard to get game. They were totally honest with me and upfront about what they wanted. I have been out with a few women who did play this game with me. I am not saying all women do this but a few do. I cant understand why a female could call a man a player but yet it seems like you all agree this is different. Why cant we just be honest about what we want in dating and relationships. I admit when I was younger I did do this. And I had it done to me as well. I got older and tired of the whole beating around the bush thing. I learned from the mistakes I made. If everyone would stop and just be honest with each other I gaurantee things would progress in the right direction. I am to busy at this point in my life to waste time on a woman who is scared about getting hurt or playing a hard to get game for whatever reason. Especaially when the woman should know better in the first place. When I was a child I acted like a child when I grew older I put away my childish behavior. I never say a woman is this way or that way. And I never compare any woman to another that I had in a previous relationship. I wouldnt waste my time on it due to the fact that they are complex. When i say i dont understand women I do not mean I do not understand they have reasons why they do what they do. I know there are reasons...but those reasons dont make it right. Right is right and wrong is wrong. I stay away from the gray due to the fact that gray makes life more complicated than it needs to be. Its pretty simple playing hard to get makes things more complicated than they need to be. So why do it? ;) |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 3rd, 2005, 1:08am on 11/02/05 at 03:46:36, Wicked_Witch wrote:
No I dont hold something like that against a woman...but come on everyone has been hurt at one time or another...I would never even get involved with a woman who recently got divorced or dumped from a relationship to begin with. I dont want to be involved in an on the rebound kind of situation. But if I liked her and i thought she was worth it, I would give her time and I would tell her the reasons for my actions as well. I wouldnt play around with her....but once the time has passed...lets be real...its no longer poor me my heart has been broken and I am still scared. Life goes on and hearts will be broken. You can use that excuse forever but after an ample amount of time has gone by the excuse really wears itself out. And I dont see nothing wrong with a woman telling a man what she wants. You know I always hear that women want men to be more understanding of them...what does that mean???? This man understands perfectly. Let me give u some examples of phrases that were said to me over the years.. 1 I want you to be more understanding of me///this usually means they want you to read their mind. 2 I never said I didnt like you////well this could mean anything it varies from woman to woman. Its a phrase used on me numerous times...this is a hard to get phrase...I just shake my head and laugh :D 3 There was no spark on our first date. I like you. I think you are a nice guy..would you like to go out with me again??? Now this is a real confuser here...If there is no spark then y are you wasting my time and y do u want to go out with me again? y would you want to go out with me again?...do u want to go out with me again?..no spark..do u want to go out with me again??? well maybe it means you can take me out as many times as you want but sex is out of the question...LOL...what does this mean...its a mind game/playing hard to get...I know she likes me...and i think she wants to have sex but i not 100% sure. lol |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 3rd, 2005, 5:19am ;DAgain Joel, you are answering your own trend.. why woman do it? Ask yourself, when you were young, why did you do it? And you got that answer. Like what we have been saying here, if a woman does it, so as the man. There is no difference. I agree in anyway what you are saying here but it boils down to the same issue...Game is a behavioral thing that you just need to cope with it...Its no difference, of why people drink, why people are overweight, why there are cheaters, killers and the list goes on. It is their behavioral choices ,uncontrol genetic defeciency to be the way they want to be and sometimes, influence by society or nature. It is up to you to either deal with it, or stay away with it.. You cannot stop them for what they are doing..but you can just ignore and deal with it. It is their choice to play a game..It is your CHOICE to be in that game.. ..If it bothers you that much, then stay away from it..If you think that this person is playing a game with you then you have the CHOICE to get away with it as you said...why bother if it bothers you that much when they are playing game?..GEt out if it bothers you! You are the only one who can control the game. For instance, your question about if you are asking someone about how she feels about you. and her answer is not direct to the point as you wanted...Try a different approach to how you ask your question to the way you understand it...For example: If your motive is to have a serious relationship with this person.. You say, hey i really like to have a serious relationship with you (clarify your motive). I really like you..would you say, do you think there is a chance for us? You clarify with her if she wants the same motive..Find out why her answer is too vague to you. If she said yes, I like u too. Then ask, from here on, what you want from me..what you want to do to make it the way you both wants to be. If she said something about I need time, give it a time..If you cannot wait, then again, it is your choice. what ever excuses she may have..it is you who controls. .If it is worthed to wait then you stay in the waiting game. And no matter what you call it,, it is still consider as a waiting game..bec you both know what the future changes that there is no guarantees how things goes.. If still you cannot understand it,,,its obvious that you can never understand that person the way she is. You are in control of the situation, you have the upper hand to ask question..this will eliminate your doubts about who is playin games with you or not..Bec like what everyone is saying, in every situation, there might be a reason why.. maybe she is not too expressive enough about her feelings. And get it through to her somehow..Find a ways to find out how she can express herself..to the way it is clear to you how she feels...again, do not just read her mind..bec if you do, you think she is playing a game to you... the key communicate, ask question.. That is why you try to get to know this person..And by knowing this person..it takes time..It does not happen overnight how a person feels the same way you feel. Again the key is you got the upper hand to control if this will turn out to be a game or not. Ask question in a sensitive way, listen, gather the facts, then draw your conclusion if she is playing the game of love or not..In conclusion, asking question can clears the mind of being confused..thus eleminates doubts .... ...That is the one reason why gals ask too many quesitons and not being noisy. THis acts sometimes been mistakenly meant to them as nagging or being noisy. and it goes the same as woman....;D ;D [smiley=wall.gif] [smiley=wall.gif] NOte: These thoughts goes the same way for woman as well... |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 3rd, 2005, 6:31am on 11/01/05 at 07:40:28, mylane wrote:
I know one..My biatch...Madd still playing hard to get..darn it..i tried my luck too but dang...he is so hard to get ;D ;D ;D.... [smiley=icon_drink.gif]I'm still imagining and wonder ing if he is a bot.... [smiley=wall.gif] [smiley=wall.gif] |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 3rd, 2005, 6:33am on 11/02/05 at 09:51:57, earthlingorgeous wrote:
Great point Mercedez!!! |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 3rd, 2005, 6:38am on 11/02/05 at 10:01:30, mylane wrote:
Thanks Biatch on 11/02/05 at 10:01:30, mylane wrote:
LMAO you got a great point there my Biatch....... [smiley=icon_drink2.gif] |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by earthlingorgeous on Nov 3rd, 2005, 9:26am on 11/03/05 at 01:08:52, thebeast wrote:
Hahahahahaha! Joel... don't ever try to understand women you will go crazy!!! However if you still want to know whats behind those lines heres what I think: ... in my POV when women said that "I want you to be more understanding of me" means your so full of yourself you don't focus on the girl but on what you need??? when a girl said this do you ask her what do you need...then go from there we women don't ask you to read our minds but be more open with communication. When a woman said "I never said I didn't like you" means the girl is being POLITE!!! It means you are a nice person but not that nice enough to be a boyfriend material for her!!! And the third premise...when the girl said "there's no spark on the first date would you like to have another" the girl is being POLITE again and she sees some potential in you that maybe you were nervous on the first date or you did something stoopid that the spark didn't came immediately ... maybe on the 2nd date you will shine and she wants to find out if its not just 1st date nervousness thingy. Hey, Joel this is my POV ok!!! Peace!!! on 11/03/05 at 06:33:35, CooCHie wrote:
Thanks Coochie choochie Cooo!!! Hahahaha! Joel is so confused he needs all the POV he can get lol! Peace Joel!!! LOLOL |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 3rd, 2005, 4:22pm Thanks for clarifying as point of view(POV) Mercedez. Excert from He Is Not Into You. I have to borrow this Dale, THanks "So just to ReCap. All Women think too much when it comes to Men. Men for the most part think with their crotch. Simple. Women often just don't read the signs that Men give off to them as the actual way a Man feels. BUT...NEWS FLASH, HE ISN'T PLAYING HARD TO GET! ;D ;D ;D" I guess we think too much that we miss the sign, and those signs ,you guys are sending us are too much or too confusing because when a woman is inlove their mind is not working..lol.....and when you know you got us, you stay away and away... ;D and move on to the next gal...he he he just a thought.... |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 4th, 2005, 12:03am I dont think your average man plays hard to get. If he got movie star looks and got women all over him yes..maybe so..but for the most part men are easy. I know I am not hard to get if you are honest with me and dont try to trick me. But the second when i feel like I am being tricked into something..I get out. I have no time anymore to chase a woman who wants a commitment from me and then she plays games with my mind. If she wants a commitment she needs to let me know..but dont try to trick me into it. All those lines I posted were lines used by women, who I liked and I know liked me. They told me they did at one time or another. Thats another thing I have experienced.. one day she tells me she likes me the next day or week she says well she never said she didnt like me. Or There was no spark during our last date yet that night when when I took her home and I told her I had a great time and would like to go out again and she agreed with a big smile on her face. I suppose when she agreed with me she was just lying to be nice and not hurt my feelings???? Well if thats the case lying is lying then..but its not the case she wasnt lying. Now come on if there was no spark it would of been a dull date to begin with and I would of not told her I wanted to go out with her again. I am no dummy I know a dull date when I am out on one. If its dull for one its dull for both. I am no idiot. I have been in the dating game a long time..maybe not as much now than what I used to be before my daughter moved in with me..but I still go out on a few dates every year. I know exactly whats up. And earth it seems you think that every line a woman gives me simply means she is being nice and doesnt want to hurt my feelings. LOL I dont think so... these women have known me for a considerable amount of time. They know my honest and direct approach to everything that I do. I dont want this to sound like I got all these women after me cuz I dont. But what I do know is that women who give me those lines probably have a lot of men after them. Well I not gonna go chasing any woman who seems to think my time is no different than any of the other dudes who are approaching her. Cooch none of it drives me crazy..I just think its funny. Its hillarious when you all have such hypocritical point of views. You sit there and curse a man who lies and cheats on you..but then you think its okay to play with his mind. Its just funny lol :D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Nov 4th, 2005, 5:05am Lol, Joel...still making a stand even though you are outnumbered, eh? I think you should ask the male posters to help you out in this thread of yours so we can get more POV's on this topic. I always enjoy it whem Men pit against Women! Have you never learned your lesson yet? WOMEN ARE ALWAYS RIGHT! [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif] |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 4th, 2005, 12:33pm on 11/04/05 at 05:05:46, Wicked_Witch wrote:
LOL eidth...I not against anyone. I not picking sides...i know I am right on this. I dont know what happen to dale..maybe he is scared. LOL |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by earthlingorgeous on Nov 4th, 2005, 3:18pm on 11/04/05 at 12:33:17, thebeast wrote:
Oh shucks Joel... just shake hands with us!!! the world will be so much better if men don't argue with women lol!!! We women are always right! Believe me!!! |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by nOrKAy on Nov 4th, 2005, 6:34pm Hey,that's the thrill! LOL. If you,men,don't like "playing-hard-to-get" women, what about your idea of "easy-to-get" ones? If we women,don't tend to act like this,then the word "courtship" had never been created,in the first place. Well,I don't play hard to get.If a guy says he likes me,I can answer him right away either yes or no. And if I say no, it's really no.Same way if I do like him too. When a woman doesn't say or act positively right away when a man asks something, it doesn't mean the woman is just playing-hard-to-get. It doesn't mean either we are just playing if we don't right away agree with men,because if we are just playing,why would we intend to be hard-to-get or why do we need to think about it and don't just go with the game? So,our dear men, if you think we are just playing-hard-to-get, NO,and I believe the general answer here, is WE TAKE PRECAUTIONS before we go on,on something. If I say I like you too after you said you like me, and after that, the man asked me to show my ass,and I say no, is that playing hard to get?? ?? ?? NO.That's not just right. Even prostitutes tend to be hard-to-get, for a higher prize.LOL. Same thing with decent women,they want to get more assurance. If women don't tend to be hard-to-get, then men don't need to go for prostitutes.LOL. Anyway,whatever your experience is,please don't put the judgement to every woman you are going to encounter. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Dromar on Nov 4th, 2005, 7:12pm If your finding many ladies hard to get you may want to examine your personality flaws and refine yourself. Self examination is a wonderful thing. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 4th, 2005, 11:07pm I never said all women are this way..I am saying women who do this..especially women who know you and still do it are playing mind games and thats no different than a guy cheating or lying. Thats it I not chovenistic..hell i love women. But when they play hard to get..it really makes me wonder if they are real or not. Being cautious is cool and taking precautions is cool also...but cant you be honest and be that way..just cuz you think a guy is lying to you does that mean u should lie also? U know honesty from the start can even weed out a lot of the men game players...hell if u want a comitment and you say thats what u want..hell if the guy isnt ready i bet it would scare him off. lol but dont try to trick him into it..come on...thats just gonna cause problems later. I have lied and cheated before... I freely admit it...but I think I had good reasons of why I did lie and cheat but that still dont make it right. As I got older and more mature I started to feel bad about it. My point is playing hard to get is not any different than lying or cheating. And the women who do this are no better than the men who are lying and cheating. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Need4Speed8DaleJr on Nov 5th, 2005, 2:50am on 11/04/05 at 12:33:17, thebeast wrote:
Well...It was Halloween. lol [smiley=pumpkin.gif] Plus I don't take sides...Nothing is ever Black & White. Unless of course if your a Skunk, then it's all Good. ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 5th, 2005, 4:31am on 11/05/05 at 02:50:01, Need4Speed8DaleJr wrote:
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by nOrKAy on Nov 5th, 2005, 6:48am on 11/04/05 at 23:07:42, thebeast wrote:
Why? If we take precautions or if we are being cautious, does it mean we are not honest? Not because we think the guy is lying,we lie also,rather, that must be the reason why we tend to abnegate in going on with you.And abnegating is not lying to me. Same thing as "I like you ,but I don't know you yet." on 11/04/05 at 23:07:42, thebeast wrote:
It would scare you and that's why you stay away.That's same reason for us,women. on 11/04/05 at 23:07:42, thebeast wrote:
I am sorry but I disagree. I can tell that your assumption of the woman who is just being cautious or trying to see something from you,like wether you are sincere or you just want something from her, is that she is just playing, and that,I disagree. on 11/04/05 at 23:07:42, thebeast wrote:
What do you really mean "trick"? Can you cite a case how do women trick? Let me say this, if you dated a woman in two ,three or more times and still you are not getting her,I suppose the problem is on your side.LOL. Another example,LOL. I am irrefutably hungry and there's a good food on the table yet under the table, there's a snake,LOL. Yes,I am hungry,but I don't want to just go ahead grab the food even if I know it will cause me to die by the snake. Now let me ask, is my action of not going on that table and grab the food,lying that I am not hungry? NO.I was just being careful. In your case though Joel, if you and the girl have dated few times and think have known each other,yet you still don't see any progress about the two of you,like going into relationship, then I suppose you two are or she is just enjoying your company and don't really have plan in having commitment with you. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Gracia on Nov 5th, 2005, 6:44pm Quote:
This is real scenario of a man playing hard to get [smiley=cat39.gif]...patience is a virtue My. [smiley=angel.gif]..madd, you're my friend okay [smiley=hello.gif] Anyway, my personal notion about the issue is that, it's a woman's prerogative to play hard to get, on the other hand, it's the man's prerogative also, either to extend his patience or put a stop. Both sides have to take the consequences that corresponds their actions. Like on Dale's experienced, the woman lose her chances, and she got nothing to do but to move on. It might serve her a lesson, to respond more promptly the next time. LOL. But behind this playing hard to get, one thing i'm pretty sure, woman has her own reasons why. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Nov 7th, 2005, 1:27am on 11/05/05 at 18:44:04, Gracia wrote:
But Joel..we have to know the woman first before we can tell you why she's doing what she's doing. So about your question? Tell us who or introduce us to this woman that keeps "playing hard-to-get" on you so we can explain her reasons to you [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif] |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 7th, 2005, 4:05pm on 11/04/05 at 19:12:48, Dromar wrote:
Good point Dromar..some woman sometimes if they see a guy who is flirting left and right, then this guy tell you off hand they like you ..of course this woman has to take precautions. And there are some instances also that they will tell you they are madly inlove with you then they still flirt left and right...what do you think a lady thinks? Would you blame this lady if she is so hard to get because of that situation? And read between the lines if a lady tells you something, if she said yes she like you then something you did and said that changes her mind that makes you more not to trust you so she just stay away from you, then you know that she is not interested. Move on.. She is not into you..This point of view goes with both sexes!! You need to prove yourself that you are worthed...if so then you are worthed to be chase around ..the qualities of someone who is looking for that attributes and sees that all into you then you are worthed....Just a thought!!!!Hope this help!!! |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by mylane on Nov 7th, 2005, 4:15pm on 11/07/05 at 16:05:03, CooCHie wrote:
he is a pig! ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 7th, 2005, 8:21pm on 11/07/05 at 01:27:01, Wicked_Witch wrote:
Edith...the few women I am talking about are ones I have met and dated in person..Not any online. So no one would know them. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 7th, 2005, 8:24pm on 11/04/05 at 19:12:48, Dromar wrote:
Not finding many ladies to be hard to get..finding some ladies playing hard to get. Most that are true to themselves and have confidence in themselves are not this way. Others who are insecure and not sure of themselves are this way. ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by thebeast on Nov 7th, 2005, 8:27pm on 11/07/05 at 16:05:03, CooCHie wrote:
Is this for both sexes as well??? |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 14th, 2005, 3:41am on 11/07/05 at 20:27:44, thebeast wrote:
Of course ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by nelson3082000 on Nov 14th, 2005, 5:57am well man and woman are hard to get, the thrill of the chase the passion its all part of love.Men you have to pursue hard and dont let that special girl get away, take it form me i have let the special one get away but im chasin so very hard now tho. |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 14th, 2005, 9:20am on 11/14/05 at 05:57:28, nelson3082000 wrote:
Catherine the bot so hard to catch up with Nelson....what car do you drive? She drive fast and furious... [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif]I could hardly keep track of her [smiley=furious3.gif] [smiley=furious3.gif] wish you luck for chasing her....must be worthed eh!!!!What a lucky woman [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] [smiley=icon_dance.gif] |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Fallen on Nov 14th, 2005, 8:36pm If u Find any woman that plays hard to get call me ........ |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 14th, 2005, 8:37pm Your the master of women playing hard to get fallen? lol..keep us a tip how you handle then |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Fallen on Nov 14th, 2005, 9:15pm Coochie San im givin lessons 5-9pm join if u like...... |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by CooCHie on Nov 14th, 2005, 9:18pm ;D ;D ;DIs that with fee? Dang Catherine da bot I max my credit card on her |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Nov 15th, 2005, 2:01am on 11/03/05 at 01:08:52, thebeast wrote:
I think she's hesitating because you didn't follow up on that first date. Being away on an important business is not accepted as a valid reason. Calls are not enough. Maybe the woman thinks you are just putting her on hold coz you have not gotten what SHE thinks you want from her, which is S-E-X. Maybe she wants to make sure you really want her for what she is and that you dont just need another f**k buddy in her? Joel, you just can't disappear after a first date without sex coz the woman is sure to think u got disappointed that she didnt give it to you then reappear again when the time is convenient and still expect her to welcome you with an open arms? If that's what happened she will think you just want to try out ur luck again this time around. I think she wants everything on a permanent status. And if you're not ready for that, then run for your life! ROFLMAO |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by nOrKAy on Dec 16th, 2005, 4:17pm on 11/04/05 at 19:12:48, Dromar wrote:
I seem to be free tonight and same time in the mood to read everything in the forum. I am currently reviewing each posts of members I haven't "met" yet and I came across this post of you, Dromar. I missed it. Anyway, I was very much impressed on this entry of you. What a sensible/judicious one. And yes, HELLO TO YOU. ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Saffire_65 on Dec 23rd, 2005, 6:27pm on 11/04/05 at 05:05:46, Wicked_Witch wrote:
errrr twinnie sorry but this time i have to disagree with you. Nobodys perfect so women are not always right. Sad to say that we women are sometimes too ego to admit our mistakes and we prefer the men to bow to our whimps and demands. Well men usually gives in not because we are always right hell they are worried that they might be placed in a dog house for days or even weeks LMBO No offence intended and neither do I take any sides. Just my honest view ;D |
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Title: Re: Women Playing Hard To Get Post by Wicked_Witch on Dec 27th, 2005, 6:30am on 12/23/05 at 18:27:27, Saffire_65 wrote:
My point exactly, Twinnie! No matter if women are wrong, they would still be right or there would be hell to pay! [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif] [smiley=roll.gif]Nahhh...that's just a common joke between husband and wife, like the mother-in-law thing? You're too serious, Twinnie!!;D |
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