1freeworld Groups - Print Page


    
      
        1freeworld Groups
        (http://www.1freeworld.net/cgi-bin/Yabb/YaBB.cgi)
      

        Romance & Relationships >> Love & Relationships >> "Monkey Business"
        
(Message started by: nOrKAy on Oct 20^th, 2006, 7:11am)

Title: "Monkey Business"
Post by nOrKAy on Oct 20^th, 2006, 7:11am

I have written this in my blog during the night when I was in blogging mood and, since just few of you visit my blog, I decided to also enter and share this topic here as I want to hear others' views about this.

Monkey Business

Anyway, I was kind of bored last night so I did my best to at least scan my friends profiles and a quote sticked with me. One of the best I've read goes something like this, "A wise monkey is a monkey who doesn't monkey with another monkey's monkey".

The first word that came into my mind after I read this quotation was, "INFIDELITY". I'm focusing on the idea of infidelity and not whether we're in fact monkeys.

[For those not familiar with the term, "infidelity" it's a fancy word for cheating on your significant other.]

So why is it that we're so fascinated with another monkey's monkey?

One of my best friends is a doctor and I've had discussions with her on this subject. My question was whether our desire for another monkey's monkey is simply nature calling or whether it's volitional.

I'm not suggesting we're zombies going from one monkey to the next, but perhaps a portion of it is genetic. We all have control over our actions, so simply being attracted to another monkey isn't a license to monkey with that monkey. What I'm curious about is whether the attraction itself is normal.

If we're to rely on ancient texts then there is cause for concern. "As a man thinketh so is he." If our thoughts are a reflection of our true self then I am in some big, big trouble. And I'm probably not alone.

But I believe there is a difference between thoughts and actions.

I do agree that all, but, the most reflexive actions begin with thoughts, so obsessing about something is different than a fleeting thought. Since the person who constantly thinks about something is probably more likely to do it than the person who can control their thoughts.

So, how do we control our thoughts when a very attractive monkey presents itself? Well, my friend has confirmed that there are natural processes that occur whether we like it or not. For example, when I smell chocolate chip cookies I get hungry and I want to eat those chocolate chip cookies. I don't need to consider it – it's automatic.

However, there is another part of my brain that knows too many chocolate chip cookies turns my body into a bakery with unwanted curves. So I have to make a decision whether or not it's in my best interests to eat those cookies.

So perhaps the difference between a wise monkey and a foolish monkey is considering in advance the cost of monkeying with another monkey's monkey. After all, that monkey has a monkey who loves it that will be hurt by our actions.

So how do we decide which monkey is right for us? That's probably a blog unto itself, but I do know that monkeys come in many beautiful shapes and sizes, and the best fit is NEVER TAKE ANOTHER MONKEY'S MONKEY !

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by nOrKAy on Oct 20^th, 2006, 7:36am

So this is all about INFEDILITY. And the questions go like this:

If you are attracted to a certain person and you know he/she is already with somebody, do you still go with your feelings and win his/her heart?

Or, do you think it is OK to take others' monkey? And go with what they say, "it's really us that meant for each other".

I have actually encountered this issue. I was so attracted with someone before but I knew he had a girlfriend. For sure, he was attracted to me too but because I knew he had one, so I avoided him.

So, share your thoughts folks! :)

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by Gracia on Oct 21^st, 2006, 5:01am

Quote:

If you are attracted to a certain person and you know he/she is already with somebody, do you still go with your feelings and win his/her heart?

I prefer to thread on clear water Krissy. I will not get involve with someone who has special someone already. It's risky for my feelings and i'm not that adventurous either. I don't want to get hurt intentionally. You will be hurting the person and so definitely you'll not be free from hurt too. It's okay if I get hurt as long as I didn't hurt her first.

Quote:

Or, do you think it is OK to take others' monkey? And go with what they say, "it's really us that meant for each other".

I believe that saying, if he's meant for you, he is for you no matter what. So, I have to wait when the air is clear and that's the time I get in. In that way, I won't be hurting anyone along the way and the guy will surely have a clear mind to decide what and who's best for him.

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by Wicked_Witch on Oct 25^th, 2006, 11:11am

I agree with Grace. I would never take another's monkey no matter how attractive he is. (he would still be a monkey anyway. hehehehe! J/k). The reason is obvious, stealing another's monkey will cause nothing but trouble, emotionally and spiritually. For If how can I be happy if I have to worry all the time about his other half or gf? If she's the martyr type, I don't think I will have the heart to see her crying because of me. And if she's a tigress, I don't think I will just stand somewhere while she throws insults after insults my way. And if he has done it to his gf, what's my guarantee that he will not do the same thing to me? So anyway I look at it, it will only bring me troubles. If we are meant for each other? Love will find a way. But I will not push my luck by taking chances.

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by ClumsilyIdiotic on Oct 27^th, 2006, 8:22pm

The ultimate challenge I guess is wanting something we don't have or can't have. That is what draws us to a thing or person. Is it human nature? Perhaps. But it's no excuse. Not to say that trying to win a woman or man's attention/affection already in a relationship is a prize to be won.

I would never conscioulsy steal another's boyfriend. But I was in two occassions been an object of a man's attention several years ago. The more you ignore these buggers, the more interested they get and there is just no talking to them. Their ego is much more bigger than their useless brains.

For a man, I think it's more about a matter of controlling his testosterone than his thoughts. ;D

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by astrobloke on Nov 21^st, 2006, 7:03am

I think any man instantly becomes more attractive to other women the moment he gets a girlfriend. I have noticed a huge difference in interest level from women from being single to taken and it happens everytime.

Do women see it as a challenge to get this mans attention and poop on his gf ?

Is it that a man becomes more attractive once he has been proved to be in demand and has been 'validated' by another woman ?

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by ClumsilyIdiotic on Nov 22^nd, 2006, 4:01pm

I can't say I completely disagree with you, Astrobloke. But there was this one time when this good looking yet unappealing guy at work was almost invisible to us who works with him. He is just too quiet and seem to have his own world and just minds his own business. Until we all saw him going out with this lady who, judging from what little we know about him - is way out of his league. I remember it made quite a stir among all the other ladies because that's when the women took notice of him - when it was realised that he is not this unfeeling dude after all. They are a lovely couple who obviously brings out the best in the other. But I digress.

For me, a man becomes instantly attractive the minute he shows no interest at all. Not an ignorant mind you, but who doesn't gawk at a woman displaying more skin than is customary. (What is customary these days?)

Title: Re: "Monkey Business"
Post by bad_day_me on Jan 4^th, 2007, 7:04pm

;D ;D ;D

is this havin a bizz with the monkey....???
i hate monkey bizz!!!